Weekly Ad Uncoiling: (sorta NSFW) Love Condoms

I apologize right here up front for this post, which will absolutely put this fucking song in your head for days. Here, as part of a new print campaign out of Belgium for Love brand condoms, the head (sorry) of Microsoft makes yet another embarrassing ad appearance, this time minus Jerry Seinfeld’s dickiness. I guess Love figures Bill won’t sue. And when you (or at least I) think about it, the scenario of someone seemingly as asexual and powerful as Bill Gates suing a condom company is pretty ridiculous. But not as ridiculous as this ad! Dressing up penises like beefy finger puppets? How 6th grade! Belgian ad agencies sure have some crazy-ass notions about what effective condom advertising looks like, yes? This disembodied dick-work was created by Brussels shop Troy — ha, they have a Trojan horse on their landing page. Jump for a second ad featuring a tattooed theoretical Arnold Schwarzenegger schwanz. You can view the rest of the campaign, including a super-tasteless John Lennon execution, here.

29 Responses to “Weekly Ad Uncoiling: (sorta NSFW) Love Condoms”

  1. lauren Says:

    oh. my.

  2. Jani Says:

    That just…. didn’t make any sense… at all.
    And I was just about to go to sleep. How will my dreams turn after this.
    I think this is much worse than people cutting of their sacks and turning it into coinpurse… Somebody got paid for planning these!

  3. Bishka Says:

    I’m sorry to say that I love this.

    Really, I am sorry.

  4. christiane Says:

    tee hee penis

    (srry)

  5. Zoetica Says:

    The comments in the last link are the best:
    - “This is what I call The Crisis of Creation”
    - “Shouldn’t they stand instead of hang?”

    And a few heartfelt complaints about all the, uh, members of the campaign being circumcised.

  6. Mer Says:

    hahahahahahahahahaha

  7. R. Says:

    I’m glad I swallowed my water before seeing this because I would have spat it out laughing so hard. Amazing what they come up with.

  8. Shay Says:

    Ahahaha, this is awesome.

  9. January Says:

    Ah haha *snort* ha haha. Wow.

  10. Ruairi Says:

    Honerable mention goes out to “Ice-Dick” for being the only one with two helmets. Arf!

  11. paul blume Says:

    brilliant — can’t imagine either Gates or Schwartzeneger objecting to these. Chuckling to themselves, maybe.
    Though, yes, they should be pointing up, rather than down.

  12. Jovana Says:

    El penor! *horselaugh* nyahahahaha

  13. OMG Says:

    is that the right size of bill’s?

  14. mr cow Says:

    their the same penis, look at the veins. and they should have put in the crappy fake accenting for the anuld one.

  15. marsiouxpial Says:

    darn, i was kind of hoping there would be one of oj simpson saying “if the glove doesn’t fit, you must acquit.”

  16. Winominx Says:

    I just logged in to say that that’s pretty disgusting; and you don’t know how Bill Gates may be in the bedroom, you could be surprised…

  17. q gauti Says:

    i wouldn’t be certain about those quotes and their attribution, considering one of the subjects bears only the moniker ‘icedick’

    would you want to take advice from a schlong in an aviator cap?

  18. Nadya Says:

    q gauti, I think the question you need to ask on this blog is… who wouldn’t?

  19. Captain Nuclear Says:

    You see this. This is why we can’t have nice things…

  20. Bill Gates as a Rubber Promises No More Viruses | GADGET REVIEWS Says:

    [...] Coilhouse [via Gizmodo] [...]

  21. Tequila Says:

    What would have made this better was if they chose people who are total dicks or cocky bastards in real life. Still if you play 2 Live Crew’s “Dick Almighty” as you read this…hilarious.

    @Nadya…everyone knows you only listen to things in top hats or those hats old men wear for quality advice. Anyone who wears an aviator cap and is not actually and aviator should be viewed with EXTREME suspicion! Especially if they are said body part. They’re know to say just about anything to get what they want.

  22. Ghalib Mirza Says:

    This is nasty, you people whats wrong with you. Where are the moral values, where is the shame, where is respect and where is privacy, tsk tsk tsk…shame shame and shame…

  23. Mer Says:

    Please, Ghalib! For your own sake, restrain yourself! A lot of folks around here have pronounced punishment fetishes. Spankings, whipping, whappings on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper, nipple-clampings, etc, etc and etc. You’ll only encourage the filthy rabble.

  24. Zoetica Says:

    I can has shame-spanking?

  25. Mer Says:

    HUSSY.

  26. Gabriew Says:

    Good idea! Nice campain.
    ;)

  27. CuCu Says:

    嗯哼~

  28. Bill Gates is a dick (NSFW) [Badvertising] | Techno Portal Says:

    [...] Belgian condom ad, discovered by alt-culture magazine Coilhouse, features Bill Gates as a penis, wrapped in what the ad calls an “efficient antivirus.” Here’s the uncensored [...]

  29. Sqoozes Says:

    Those are the best pics ever..lol.

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