“First-Ever” Hello Kitty Maternity Ward Now Open

First, I’m going to meet this guy… no, wait, this guy. And he’s going to give me this ring. And on our wedding day, I’m going to wear this dress, and eat this cake. And on our wedding night, I’ll wear this, and hopefully these will work, but if not, it’s cool, because I’ve always wanted to put together one of these! We’re going to build this kind of home. With these couches, and this dog. And if anyone dares to break into our house to steal our our awesome toasterwe’re gonna blow them away with this AK-47. So when it comes time the birthing to commence, I’m gonna fly Hello Kitty Airlines to Taiwan. From the airport, I’ll be rushed to the new Hau Sheng Hospital in this car, and there, I’m going to give birth to one of these. And he’ll grow up to be this big!

But seriously, this new Hello Kitty maternity hospital that just opened in Taiwan is the place to be. According to Reuters:

Newborns get everything Hello Kitty but a set of whiskers, including pink or blue receiving blankets, nurses dressed in pink uniforms with cat-themed aprons, cot linen and room decor. In the lobby, a Hello Kitty statue in a doctor’s uniform greets patients, and twice a year people in feline costumes visit mothers and children. The cat’s likeness even shows up on birth certificate covers.

I wish I could get born there.

20 Responses to ““First-Ever” Hello Kitty Maternity Ward Now Open”

  1. psychomar Says:

    This was like reading a well made Bizzaro Blog, except it induces vomiting from its subject matter rather than its humor

  2. marsiouxpial Says:

    but but but….you forgot to conceive here!!!
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyY5_T35Oik
    (it’s in there….wait for it…..wait for it….. at 2:20….)

  3. Sam Ramirez Says:

    DAMMIT!
    If only my mother lived in Taiwan and I was born this year!

    *I say this calls for a new category called “cuteness”

  4. Terra Trouvé Says:

    Is this the start of franchise themed hospitals?
    will my children be born in a Jurassic Park Ward?
    I certainly hope so.

  5. dan mcenroe Says:

    Those hello kitty sheets are going to look awesome covered in blood, amniotic fluid, and the sundry other bodily juices that were abundantly present at my kids’ births.

  6. kate Says:

    you should have honeymooned at the hello kitty themepark
    http://www.puroland.co.jp/english/welcome.html

    ….IT’S LIKE MY DREAMS

  7. Alice Says:

    My very first thought was the same as dan mcenroe’s…such a weird juxtaposition that must make! Seems like it’s be very much like a lot of the paintings being produced these days…

  8. copyranter Says:

    Talk about your brand extensions. Also, this, for your first camping trip:
    http://www.oneinchpunch.net/2008/08/03/hello-kitty-mosquito-repellent-patch/

  9. six06 Says:

    sign me up for the Hello Kitty Coffin. :P

  10. R. Says:

    Oh…Sanrio and Hello Kitty…they had me with the Hello Kitty massager.

  11. Jerem Morrow Says:

    I’ve seen enough Hello Kitty vibrators in friend’s bed-side drawers, to stock an entire…bread box, but you get the point. Nevermind what I was doing looking in those drawers. Stop glaring suspiciously at me. DON’T JUDGE ME!!!

    And Nadya, you’ve achieved it. You, like Mer, scare me a little.

  12. Esoteric Style Says:

    My girlfriend and I own that toaster. It actually does print her face on every slice, though most of the time, the cat resembles some sort of cancer-ridden burn victim. We also have the matching sandwich press and water cooler. Yes. I said water cooler.

    I’m sick, I know.

  13. Tequila Says:

    This is at the same time as cute as it is utterly disturbing. I’m all for the idea of creating an ideal hospital environment for children but this is totally heavy handed and a bit crass. It just may be my naive idea of NOT bombarding a kid with stuff like this upon birth but then as a baby you really never have a choice do you? After all I think most of us here were tossed into Disney themed or branded stuff during Year One anyhow.

    Though as the above post said…all that stuff covered in blood and bodily fluids is kind of a fun image. Lets see if they’ll post THOSE pics online as a selling point…

    Now as long as we’re gonna have themed birthing rooms I want to see a Hellraiser one. I mean come on it’d be totally fitting and cool…

    Also…to get a lil war going…

    GI JOE…is WAY COOLER THAN Hello Kitty… :D

  14. Jerem Morrow Says:

    @Tequila

    GI Joe? Give me an Evil Dead themed hospital any day, over those red and blue laser-tossing soldiers. Where are your priorities, honestly?

    “Why have you disturbed our sleep; awakened us from our 9 month slumber? You will die! Like the others before you, one by one, we will spit up on you. “

  15. BlueAnchorNatasha Says:

    First of all, Ive lost my appetite. Second of all, Id like to shoot the owner of that glamguns website with their own merchandise, and thirdly, WHAT the FUCK?? I suddenly have significant respect for Disney for the fact that they have NO gone quite as far as hello kitty, and even if they did it would probably be viewed as genuinely cute instead of downright nauseating.
    Now if noone minds, Im going to go wash off the dripping saracsm Ive accumulated from this post.

  16. meardearna Says:

    @Tequila

    All the Hong Kong girls commented on the Hello Kitty themed house keep saying what a cute and wonderful place it is. To them, it is not crass but the most feminine bling a girl can have!

    I’m just rather concerned for the health of the babies born there and their mothers (and the staff too): Don’t they get sick from seeing all those shades of pink all the time?

  17. Tequila Says:

    @Jerem…Oh come now. An army of flamboyantly dressed terrorists who run the gamut from S&M chic to the utterly daft VS. an army of equally flamboyant protectors of liberty who take military fetishism to levels none have ever matched….beats a dude with a chainsaw hand any day :P …still both remain cooler than Hello Kitty…the REAL enemy here. Do not let their cuteness divide us! It’s how they win man!

    @meardearna…I’ve no doubt HK girls find this utterly perfect for their childbirth needs. Really it’s a choice made to comfort the mother to be over the child…I get that now. I do have to admit that the usual sterile nature of hospitals does need a LITTLE sprucing up. One has to wonder if this is the future…themed rooms for hospitals like the theme hotels couples at times find themselves in. Would be ironic if a couple conceived a child in a Hello Kitty themed room and gave birth in one also.

    Pretty sure the kid to spawn from it would be the Antichrist though. A cute one at that.

  18. Coilhouse » Blog Archive » “First-Ever” Hello Kitty bMaternity/b Ward b…/b | Motherhood Maternity Says:

    […] Originally posted here:  Coilhouse » Blog Archive » “First-Ever” Hello Kitty bMaternity/b Ward b…/b […]

  19. takari mitchell Says:

    I love hello kitty very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very much hello kitty rocks its like she rules very much.

  20. Bekah Says:

    I am in heaven. I have showed the Ak to all my friends and they know it is what I NEEEEEED!!!!! BTW the hello kitty “massagers” will shock you, be careful. I am a hello kitty addict from way back! As a former boss of mine said, I should do drugs instead.