She Can’t Be Gay, She’s a Cheerleader
Learning their proper roles in life.
Brothers and sisters, I have a terrible confession; I was once A GAY. Lord have mercy! Lucikly, my parents had the good sense to ship me off to Love in Action, an ex-gay recovery camp for teens in Memphis, Tennesse. I learned many things at this camp; that homosexuality doesn’t exist, that men with bios like this and this make great mentors for kids, and that a 4-week course called WIVES’ TRACK can change your life forever. The reason I’m telling you all this is because I recently re-watched the 2000 film But I’m a Cheerleader and I was outraged. Outraged! How dare they ridicule something as holy as conversion therapy?
The entire cast is going straight to Hell: RuPaul (as camp counselor, completely out of drag), Clea Duvall (thou shall not tempt me!), Mink Stole, Natasha Lyone (damned since ’86 for appearing in Pee-Wee’s Playhouse), Bud Cort (Harold from Harold and Maude – here in a dad role, and I can’t believe how much he’s aged), and all the rest of them. Inspired by that filthy pervert John Waters, the film’s mockery of gender identity and the sacred institution of marriage is unforgivable.
You can see the entire shameful thing on YouTube, and you can still buy the shameful DVD. And here’s the shameful trailer:
[kml_flashembed movie="http://youtube.com/v/-MihKLBP4DQ" width="400" height="330" wmode="transparent" /]
The team that created this film has a new film out called Itty Bitty Titty Comittee. Lord Jesus, it hurt to even type that! As soon as I get the chance to see this one, expect an angry write-up. In the meantime, I urge you all to focus your anger at Singapore for frowning upon cosmetic products that promote Our Lord. For shame!
February 14th, 2008 at 8:17 pm
This movie made me pee with the laughing. And yes, Clea DuVall is uber crushworthy.
Ooo… I just watched the preview for IBT Committee. Looks fun!
February 14th, 2008 at 8:18 pm
Bwahahaha…anybody near Memphis willing to do a little investigative reporting for hilarity’s sake? Might be dangerous getting past Harry Potter’s wizard powers tho: http://www.loveinaction.org/default.aspx?pid=111
February 14th, 2008 at 8:38 pm
That’s one of my fave movies! I’ll have to rewatch it tomorrow. But holy shit, so good.
And remember.
Cheers make girls do stupid cartwheels. Orgasms make people feel good.
February 15th, 2008 at 1:02 am
I looooooooooooooove that movie. The colors, the clothes, the music, the beautifully directed actors who pull off scenes that in other hands would fall flat…of course it’s all just a Hollywood fantasy since as the wonderfully enlightened people at Love in Action state…
“…Because there is no such creation as a “gay” or “homosexual” person. There is only homosexual attraction and behavior; accordingly, there can be no change from a sexual identity that never existed in the first place…”
Right. right?. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
“Clea Duvall (thou shall not tempt me!)….” Give up now, many have tried to resist her charms and failed miserably :P
All was lost for me when she did Carnivàle for HBO.
February 15th, 2008 at 7:40 am
Heh. Tis a fun movie. I think it sealed the deal when Bull from Night Court showed up.
Oh, and while the wrath is being brought upon Singapore, it should also target lightning, as this uppity atmospheric phenomenon seems to have a distinct dislike of our Lord and Savior.
February 15th, 2008 at 9:02 am
I *love* that movie :D :D :D
Showed it to my teenaged daughter, actually, and she loved it, too!
February 15th, 2008 at 9:34 am
Oh, I’ve wanted to watch this since….I don’t know, since I got out of conversion therapy camp? And to think, I hadn’t even thought to look it up on the YouTubes! Thanks ever so!
February 15th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
oh my, thanks for posting this i forgot just how much i loved that movie….shoot, really i just forgot about that movie. my mom took me to see it when i was 13………i came out shortly thereafter….
i blame clea….haha
February 16th, 2008 at 1:05 am
ooh, i do love me some Clea Duvall.
i loved that move because she was really girly, which made me feel less like a big ol’ lesbian freak for being femmey.
February 16th, 2008 at 3:21 pm
Clea crushfest! Seriously, just about everyone I know seems to have a lil’ thing for her. She seems like she’d be so much fun to get into mischief with.
Back in these times, I thought Natasha Lyonne had appeal too. She didn’t get high vamp-o-meter scores like Clea, but she was off and running as an indie quirkstress. She was looking like the Luke Skywalker to Christina Ricci’s Darth Vader ;)
HO LEE SHIT tho did that ever not turn out to be the case! Her career was like a bottle rocket that comes back and hits you in the eye….and gives you hepatitis. I just hope she’s safe wherever she is…or doing something cool…like kickboxing champ in the Thai underground.
February 18th, 2008 at 6:27 am
@Skerror “…HO LEE SHIT tho did that ever not turn out to be the case! Her career was like a bottle rocket that comes back and hits you in the eye….and gives you hepatitis…”
I ran into her (literally) outside a show in late 06’…kept debating to myself if that was her or not until she started talking. Can’t really mistake that voice of hers. She wasn’t looking…well. At that moment she reminded me a lot of Tara Reid…scary stuff. Luckily though she seems to be getting back into herself as an actress…2008 looks to be a busy year for her. But man did she kill my crush on her hard that night…
February 18th, 2008 at 7:19 pm
Be kind to old Bud Court, he was in a really terrible car accident at the height of his career and was dealing with rehabilitation and plastic surgery during what could have been his most important years. He’s actually kind of a role model of mine.
September 24th, 2008 at 12:44 am
I wasn’t in love with this movie, but it did give me a few chuckles. Although, I had not heard about it until watching the doc, this Film Is Not Rated, And saw the director talking about her struggles with the MPAA on this one. She is also the same director that recently made a movie under MTV about the war and our troops constantly going in and out of war. It seems she likes to cater to teens, but I don’t adore her work, I am more “flirtatious” we’ll say with her movies.
June 16th, 2011 at 3:39 am
And saw the director talking about her struggles with the MPAA on this one. She is also the same director that recently made a movie under
June 16th, 2011 at 3:40 am
reminded me a lot of Tara Reid…scary stuff. Luckily though she seems to be getting back into herself as an actress…2008 looks to be a busy year for her. But man did she kill my crush on her hard that night…