Friday Afternoon Movie: Secret Rulers Of The World

Today has not been a good day. Not. At. All. Usually, you would join your other co-workers around the photocopier, placing bets on which intern can make the most copies of their face without blinking, but you’re in no mood for such frivolities. Today you can only stare at your desk in despair. How much longer can you go on working this soul-sucking job; planted in front of your computer inside the thin, blank walls of your cubicle? What does it even matter? How can you, a single, lowly person, possibly prevail in the face of the worldwide Jewish banking conspiracy? What’s to be done?

The answer, of course, is nothing. Take it from me, an insider who types these words on a golden keyboard while sitting atop a pile of money, sipping from a tall glass of still-warm Christian baby’s blood. Don’t get too down on yourself though. After all it’s Friday. That’s a good thing, right? Sure it is. So why don’t you just ignore the screams of Jessica as her retinas are seared with ultraviolet light and watch some documentaries about a few of the people who may or may not control the world.

That’s right, this week we offer you Secret Rulers of the World, Jon Ronson’s series detailing the puppet masters who work behind the scenes and the lovable loons who strive to expose them. The highlight for me has to be Episode 2, which focuses on David Icke, a man so crazy, it turns out that when he talks about the world being run by “a race of 12 foot, blood-drinking, shape-shifting lizards” he is not making a coded reference to Jews but actually means a race of 12 foot, blood drinking, shape-shifting lizard men. You don’t run into that kind of batshit insanity everyday; especially unaccompanied by an orderly. So enjoy all five episodes; hours of New World entertainment.

Now if you’ll excuse me, my baby’s blood is getting cold.

5 Responses to “Friday Afternoon Movie: Secret Rulers Of The World”

  1. Mer Says:

    David Icke has long been one of my favorite gibbering lunatics of all time. Cheers.

  2. David Forbes Says:

    I’m going to drop my planned snide remarks about infant fritters and illuminati benders and simply thank you for putting up this series. I hadn’t seen it before and it’s really, really good stuff. Seeing Icke, in the dark, mouth “what we believe is true” with the odd, glazed look in his eyes stuck with me.

    I’ve encountered a fair amount of conspiracy nuts working in journalism, and these may be the best, most human portraits I’ve yet seen of that type of personality and mindset. It’s easy to think of them as stereotypical crazies, but the truth, as always, is more complicated. The line between eccentric activist and stark raving loon can be surprisingly thin and depressingly easy to cross.

  3. Paul Komoda Says:

    “Another Mr. Lizard!”

    Icke’s Reptilians are right up there alongside Stanislav Szukalski’s waddling Yeti hybrids as glorious, paranoia-inspired, cryptozoological predators of humankind.

    Unlike blowhards like Alex Jones, there’s something about David Icke that I always found oddly appealing.
    He seems to press on with his deliriously lurid theories
    with the earnestness of a panicked child telling his parents that there’s a monster under his bed. Besides, how can I not love the idea of lizard people?

    A few years ago I noticed that a substantial number of people I had encountered, ( most of whom I thought should otherwise know better ) had begun going on about Globalists and the Illuminati, in that all too dogmatic tone of voice.
    Naturally intrigued, I looked into these subjects and I was fortunate enough to first come across Jon Ronson’s excellent, above-posted series which gave me a healthy sense of perspective on some of the more pernicious memes slithering through the culture at large.

    Over time, I’ve become quite a fan of Ronson and will be looking forward to see the upcoming film adaptation of his book, “”The Men Who Stare at Goats”.

    Thanks, Mr. Rosenberg!

  4. Nadya Says:

    I watched the whole thing last night while unpacking here in SF. Wow – what a delightfully well-done series. I like how Jon Ronson’s investigation starts off as very objective, and ends up with him panicking, on the phone with the British Embassy, in the final Bilderberg segment. It reminded me a bit of Foucault’s Pendulum. David Icke… wow. Paul – “another Mr. Lizard,” ha ha – I thought of that too!

    BOHEMIAN GROVE! I’d still love to see a full Coilhouse post devoted to it one day. Mer, I think you were going to do one a while back, weren’t you?

    Thanks for the hours of entertainment, Ross.

  5. Jessica Says:

    Wow, yikes…good stuff. Scary as hell.

    Speaking of scary, yes, I should NOT have fallen for the “We provide free Lasik to all Coilhouse co-conspirators” line. BIG mistake.