The Dole Banana Man

Is it even necessary to discuss the utter insanity of Japanese media? I mean by this point I think it has been firmly established that, to the Western sensibility, their commercials are bat-shit crazy; 30 second recordings of spectacularly horrible acid trips. The Japanese version of Mad Men would require the talents of David Lynch and Takashi Miike working in concert. To stare into the mind of the ad man of the Far East is to stare into the face of God. We blink, for our feeble brains cannot process its wonder.

This ad for Dole bananas is no different. The Dole Banana Man struts down the street as people accost him; demanding satisfaction, which he obliges. A woman sitting on a bench despondent, it seems, from a lack of bananas. Not for long, however, as the Dole Banana Man comes upon her and, smiling at the camera, his bananastache atwitter, he bestows on her a bounty of fruit sprayed forth from one nostril; a potassium rich snot-rocket. In doing so he joins the ranks of other, food-bestowing characters like the Cheese Man who shills for Nissin, assaulting people in their homes in order to add cheese to their cups o’ curry. He even has a love interest now. No doubt Dole will do the same and give the Dole Banana Man a female counterpart; someone who he can grope with his sweet, fleshy digits.

I fear what the future holds.

6 Responses to “The Dole Banana Man”

  1. Leigh Woosey Says:

    Se also
    And then

  2. Tequila Says:

    There is enough general weirdness in Japan that it’s the only country where David Lynch would simply be another voice in the crowd. So the Japanese version of Mad Men would more likely be a mix of deep atmospheric drama with animated sequences of vintage ads involving robots and men in monster suits…and some sort of lolita secretary. It’d be kinda like Seijun Suzuki meets Yasujiro Ozu with a new generation flair…oh and with a j-pop jazz fueled opening! It would also be called SUPER CRAZY MEN OF HAPPY HAPPY TV MEDIA COMPANY.

    Japan always gets the weirdest mascots…like Pepsiman.

  3. Tequila Says:

    Oh and one cannot forget these classic gems.

  4. Glenn Says:

    It’s so wrong that I can’t stop watching this – I clearly need help! Pass me the snot bannas!

  5. Colin Peters Says:

    Nitpick: Cheese Man works for Nissin, maker of instant noodles and other delightful nutrition-free food substitutes, not Nissan, the car manufacturer.

    Think about it. It’s pure social Darwinism. If you are a Japanese ad-man, with only 15 seconds to catch a viewer’s attention, in an environment soaked with madly clever advertising, you quickly learn to be as crazy as possible.

  6. Ross Rosenberg Says:

    Colin – You are, of course, correct. Fixed!