Just in case you missed this announcement elsewhere, Zo is selling these gorgeous contoured vinyl stickers of her original artwork over at her site, Biorequiem! There are two designs: Cumulus Confection, which appeared as one of the Coilhouse section headers in Issue 02, and Poke, an artwork that Zo released as fine-art print some time ago. The stickers are coated with a UV finish, making them resistant to discoloration over time. Get ‘em before they’re gone!
Thanksgiving and Christmas are just around the corner. For many of us, these two holidays represent an opportunity to give thanks for the many blessings in life with creatively stuffed bird carcasses and to observe the sacred, immaculate birth of baby Jesus with hemorrhagic spending sprees, respectively. For others, they’re merely an excuse to go see schlockbuster matinees and pig out on massive quantities of Chinese buffet food.
[via Whittles]
No matter how you choose to celebrate T-Day and JC’s B-Day, your experience can only be improved by Cookie Misfortune:
For too long, the world of fortune cookies has been nothing but banal platitudes and generic hopes for a brighter future. That’s all over now. Cookie Misfortune is making it possible to blow minds and ruin dinners everywhere.
[The cookies' messages] range from the quotidian (Fuck you) to the particular (You will die alone and poorly dressed) to the classical (Life is nasty, brutish, and short). You’ll never get two of the same in any given box of ten. Furthermore, our Misfortunes will be changing frequently, according to our whimsy.
I have to admit something– I’ve fantasized about doing EXACTLY what Cookie Misfortune has done for years, but could never quite muster the funds (or the vitriol) to follow through. Three cheers for Russell and Jason and their fang-ed wee upstart. I hope you guys sell a fuckload of these as white elephant gifts for the holidays.
Other choice Coilhouse-sanctioned stocking stuffers:
Scrappy teensy indie vendors, have you got holiday wares you’d like to promote? Add your link in comments. (Please, just keep it short and sweet. A brief description and a URL, thanks!)
Tom LaBrie is a man’s man and a ladies man. He’s a man with a form fitting, wide collared shirt and slim, flared pants. He’s a man with a moustache and an unfortunate haircut. Tom LaBrie is also a man on a mission, and that mission is to get you into the squishy embrace of a fabulous new waterbed. Tom LaBrie made his pitch as the host of “Night Comfort Theater” on Sacramento-based UHF station KTXL in the 1970s and ’80s. In soft, sultry tones he hypnotizes the viewer, his words washing over them like warm, honeyed laudanum, enveloping them in their easy chairs, beckoning them to taste the aqueous pleasures his waterbed warehouse has to offer. Like a polyester siren, his song is nigh irresistible to all but the most steadfast insomniac Odysseus.
Whoooooo’s that laaaady?
This bust is the first in Paul Komoda’s highly-anticipated “Human Pathology” series. Paul, who previously brought you this cauliflower-tastic take on the Elephant Man, recently completed this sculpture of a woman suffering from Tertiary Syphilis (more images of the sculpt here). These busts were originally commissioned from Paul by the U. S. Department of Education – one for every classroom, placed squarely atop each health teacher’s desk, to scare students into finally taking the subject matter seriously. Unfortunately, the piece came out more garish than they expected, and the Department refused the final product. Well, their loss is your gain! Castings of this fine piece, titled La Pestilencia, are available from Artist Proof Studio for $160 a pop. What a fine thing to place on top of your piano, where you can serenade it every night – or perhaps you’d want place it on your bookshelf, betwixt your most rare leather-bound medical textbooks. It could greet guests at the dinner table, or look up at visitors mournfully from your office cubicle.
I’ve been watching Paul sculpt this thing for the past couple of months, and it still gives me the willies every time I see it up close. Paul chose to photograph the bust with some some light illuminating it from below, which I feel is a mistake. The harsh tales-around-the-campfire lighting makes the face look even more monstrous than it needs to be, and fails to show the humanity and sadness that Paul so carefully instilled into its features. For this isn’t some Hollywood ghoul – it’s a real person, based on this tragic and completely NSFL photo taken in 1973 of a syphilis patient. What a piercing photo – you can tell, by the eyes, by the cheekbones, the shape of the jaw – that this was once a beautiful woman, similar in appearance, perhaps, to Winona Ryder, but ruined by an unlucky life. She could still be alive today.
Rejoice! The new Coilhouse shop at shop.coilhouse.net is up and running, and the promised limited-run tees are available for all. Go there now! Buy! Buy! Buy! CONSUME!
For those of you who missed the post this weekend, here is everything you need to know about our new tees. For the TL;DR crowd, here are the bare essentials:
Issue 02 wants to come along for the ride. If you’re getting a shirt and haven’t picked up Issue 02 yet, now’s the time to get both and save on shipping. Issue 01 is completely sold out now (even the non-limited edition), and there are just 250 copies of Issue 02 left in stock. Get one before they’re gone, or you’ll regret it for the rest of your mortal existence.
As always, thank you so much, everyone, for your support. Every day, you’re helping us make Issue 03 and continue doing what we love. Squishes to every one of you!
Laughter, careful consideration, disbelief and finally reluctant desire are the steps my brain took in reaction to these unique Bed Shoes. Endowed with whips at the tips, they would make a great addition to The Pervert’s Guide to Etsy! Custom handmade by the talented Isabelle Chiariotti a.k.a. Etsy seller Isakaos, these bad puppies are good for one thing only, and that ain’t walking.
Unlike the majority of fetish footwear out there, the heel itself isn’t that high. I assume this is to lower the already-lofty risk of the brave owner’s collapse. I suggest pretending you’ve got a pair on your feet right now, and all the ways you could make use of them. For extra fun, imagine you are trying to actually walk in them and all the elegant ways you’d smash your face as a result.
Seriously, though – if anyone here buys these and learns to walk, dance or [especially] do gymnastics in them, we want video. And a dark part of me still wants a pair.
Clockwise: fantastic finds via Haute Macabre, via Haute Macabre, via Stylecunt, via Stylecunt
Finally – a classy gothic fashion blog! Via Gala Darling comes news of Haute Macabre, a vibrant, well-designed blog devoted to all things stylishly darque. “As you can guess from the title,” writes Gala, “it’s about high-end gawthick living. It’s for those of us who never really outgrew our goth sensibilities — the ones who idolised Wednesday Addams as an adolescent heroine, the ones who like things dark but don’t take it too seriously, the ones who can’t resist when fetishy fashion comes sashaying down the catwalk in Paris.” The blog’s primary authors are Samantha (whose site appears to be down) and Nixon Sixx, and other contributors so far include Gala herself, Courtney Riot (in a design capacity) and last but not least, our very own Zo!
The site is still “in beta,” but there are already six pages of eye candy to feast on. From luscious scans of thousand-dollar gothic-themed magazine shoots to practical lists of gothy items under $10, there’s something in store for fashionistas of all stripes.
Image from Elle Italia shoot, spotted by Haute Macabre. More here.
While we’re on the subject of alternative fashion blogs, it’s also worth mentioning Stylecunt. While that name makes me cringe, I’ll say this: the blog’s anonymous author has a keen eye for fashion and doesn’t shy away from cold-eyed, Gawker-style snark. The tone is apparent from Post Number One, where the author explains the blog’s raison d’être:
Remember when alt fashion was… fashionable? At least we thought it was. Alt fashion exploded in the nineties, fulfilling those of us that were not content with shopping at Old Navy. Time has passed, fashion is evolving, but are we? Years later and here we are, covered in the same black vinyl and cheap fishnet. One day, I had enough.
The writing on Stylecunt is hard to follow at times due to the careless grammar, and seems to be most lucid when we find the author chastising clothing labels for perceived bad choices. “Why are you still doing this to those poor goth kids who don’t know any better?” laments the author at this Lip Service catalogue photo. And it’s great to finally see someone tell Junker Designs, “it’s lovely that Alice Cooper is wearing your overly detailed and distressed leather pants, but it might be nice to actually see what they look like.”
Refreshingly, both blogs pay attention to men’s fashion, an oft-neglected topic in the alt fashion press (sorry, this doesn’t count). At Stylecunt there’s a nice post about Plazmalab, and over at Haute Macabre there’s even a well-populated category titled “For the Gents.”
Here’s hoping that 2009 will bring tons of new fashion to keep both these blogs busy. Enjoy!
The future really is here! Not only do we have a black president, but Mattel has finally sanctioned a fishnet-wearing, corseted doll titled Goth Punk Barbie. Here she is. Goth. Punk. Barbie:
GPB (above, left) was released as a $70 collector’s item for Hard Rock Cafe, and makes quite a pair with Black Canary Barbie (right), a version of Barbie based on a comic character that drew fire from religious groups earlier this year for her BDSM appearance. But you know what? I like my Barbies in pink, frilly dresses. I like my Barbies to come with a miniature Easy-Bake Oven. I like my Barbies saying “Math is hard, let’s go shopping!” Because it makes it all the more satisfying to see shit like this:
However, my favorite products of a Barbie vivisection may be these classy adornments by artist Margaux Lange:
I love the idea of wearing little ears as earrings. So precious! Writes Lange, “Barbie has become the accessory instead of being accessorized. I take pleasure in the contrast and contradiction of something mass-produced being transformed and revealed as a unique, handmade, wearable piece of art.”
Wode, the revolutionary art fragrance from Boudicca explores further the myth around Queen Boudicca [or Boadicea]. Legend has it she and her tribe wore a cobalt blue paint on their skin that gave them a ferocious and mythical look when advancing into battle. When finally defeated by the Romans Queen Boadicea killed herself by swallowing hemlock, an extract of which is included in Wode. When Wode is sprayed a vibrant cobalt mist appears and settles on the skin and clothing. Whether touched or not the ‘Wode Paint’ begins to fade and disappears completely leaving the scent behind.
That’s the official story. However, after watching the painfully seductive concept video below, my imagination went entirely elsewhere.
Perhaps half-dreaming before my daily dose of caffeine, I was whisked away to another time, where countless mermaids were enslaved and sacrificed for a wicked queen. Something of a Countess Bathory, she soaked in their cobalt tears to gain a mystical quality that made her irresistible in every way. With each bath, her skin would glow an opalescent blue, her voice would hypnotize and her eyes would leave you breathless. Alas, the magical effects of the tear potion were short lived and the slaughtering of mermaids went on until none remained on Earth.
There was another, Hentai-friendly scenario, best left to your own imaginations. Now I will have my coffee and try to make peace with spending $200 on this beguiling squid spray.
If you’re in the UK, Wode can be acquired here, otherwise consult the stocklist for a purveyor near you.
How intricate a mechanism the body, how elegant the curvature of a clavicle! It’s no wonder so many artists find themselves inspired by the wondrous hidden framework of living creatures. Collected below, some curious work by three jewelers, adventurous artisans who believe in extending the life of anatomical construction well beyond the years of its original owners.
Fist up, Julia Deville. Miss Deville’s biography hints at an interesting character I’d love to have over for tea. She is a trained cobbler, silversmith and taxidermist enthralled with nature and its inner workings. Fusing these areas of expertise she created her line – Disce Mori. Inspired by Victorian mourning artifacts and jewelry, Julia’s beautiful website’s dark clockwork theme is as entrancing as her pieces. Jet is paired with silver cast from animal bones among a selection of cuff links, buttonhole adornments and fob chains alongside necklaces and bracelets. Also here are less orthodox items – a brooch featuring a preserved mouse, for instance. Bold, yet far from costume fare, Disce Mori pieces are as timeless as they are macabre. The “Taxidermy” section is small, but shows a sense of humor with its “Kitten Rug” [exactly what it sounds like]. Viewing her works as reminders to enjoy the present, Julia makes a point to mention that the animals she uses have all died of natural causes.
Follow beyond the jump for two more purveyors of life-affirming adornments.
